Marvel Funnies: Marie Severin celebrates Dave Cockrum's birthday

Here is how Marie Severin celebrated Dave Cockrum's birthday in 2004...

With one of his favorite creations, Nightcrawler, toasting him, and drinking the rest of the X-Men under the table.  Nuff Said!

An Old-Fashioned Marvel Christmas by Marie Severin

I totally missed doing anything for Christmas here on Giant-Size Marvel, but this illustration fits in nicely.

Marie Severin did this one for Marvelmania #6, way back in 1970.  Featuring her zany interpretation of all the Marvel heroes exploding out of a Christmas present.  Note that Conan the Barbarian is leaping off the left hand side!  Apparently this issue shipped just after Christmas--they missed their deadline and so did I.  Nuff Said!

Marvel Funnies: Hulk Hates Diet Soda!

Lots of articles around about the "soda tax" many states and cities want to impose.  Seems really silly to me and a slippery slope to taxing more things that are bad for us.

This illustration featuring The Hulk reminded me of this in a roundabout way, courtesy of Loston Wallace, doing his best to channel the style of Herb Trimpe.  I featured Loston's work earlier this year on The Thing.  Please check out Loston's DeviantART site for more of his work. 

Do you remember the days when Diet Coke didn't exist but Tab was the "healthy" alternative drink?  I don't think I've seen a can of Tab around in decades.  Nuff Said!

Marvel Funnies: The Green Goblin Unmasked!

Legend has it that Stan Lee and Steve Ditko had a disagreement over the identity of the Green Goblin.  While that story may not be true, what if the Goblin was someone other than Norman Osborn?

Artist Loston Wallace has a take on this--what if the Green Goblin was none other than the most sacred person in Peter Parker's life?  Genius!  Nuff Said.

Heroes and Villains Poster by John Romita Sr and Alex Ross

Back in 2004, Alex Ross teamed up with Marvel’s classic artist John Romita Sr to produce this poster, commemorating all the characters that Romita had a hand in creating/designing for the company.  I saved a number of scans from Ross’ website that highlight key characters.

Mary Jane Watson is front and center, in her famous Face It Tiger, You Hit the Jackpot! pose.  She’s framed by Robbie Robertson (editor of the Daily Bugle) and Captain Stacy (father of Gwen).  Man-Wolf and Gibbon are here, too, but take a look at that fellow behind Robbie: The Sentry (golden age version).

The lower right corner features Wolverine, in a pose reminiscent of his first appearance in Incredible Hulk #181.  Ms. Marvel is also in this area, featuring her bikini bottom costume which made a welcome re-appearance during the Dark Reign storyline.

The left hand side features Spider-Man villains: The Kingpin, Shocker, and Rhino.  Not to mention Spidey’s extra appendages taken from Amazing Spider-Man #100!  Luke Cage is bustin’ out in his Tiara as Hero for Hire.  I was really happy to see Steve Gerber and Jim Mooney’s Omega the Unknown represented in this pantheon as well.

This panel showcases a few more offbeat characters.  Satana, the daughter of the Devil, is shown her classic Romita outfit on the left.  Namor the Sub-Mariner got a regal new costume designed by Romita (and Reed Richards) in a last ditch effort to revitalize Namor’s sales.  Misty Knight, from Iron Fist, is here, along with Spitfire from the Invaders.

I don’t have a good close up of the upper right quadrant, but take a look at the big poster scan on top of this post.  That area contains Brother Voodoo, Medusa, Mantis, Black Widow, and The Falcon’s new winged costume.  And a character from a great short story that Romita did with Stan Lee in Savage Tales, one of The Femizons!  Whoever bought this poster was very lucky indeed.  Nuff Said!

Drunk Hulk Smash Twitter!

I am burnt out on all this social networking—didn’t Prince just say that it’s all passé now?.  Facebook and Twitter seem to have one purpose, which is to sell you products via direct targeted marketing.  I’ve deactivated my Facebook, but keep my Twitter account going, because of one man: DRUNK HULK!  I always get a chuckle when I see one of his tweets.  Drunk Hulk slings off one liners as easily as Steven Wright.

Here are a few choice examples.  For instance, the ongoing saga of Bristol Palin:

BRISTOL AND LEVI BACK TOGETHER! DRUNK HULK NO BE THIS UPSET ABOUT REUNION SINCE STEPHENIE MEYER REUNITE WITH TYPEWRITER!

ARGENTINA MAKE GAY MARRIAGE LEGAL! LEVI AND BRISTOL MAKE JOKE OF MARRIAGE IN AMERICA! ONE STEP FORWARD! TWO STEP BACK!

Oh yes, Drunk Hulk always types with CAPS ON!  On Mel Gibson:

DRUNK HULK BET MEL GIBSON WISH HE MAKE SEX TAPE LIKE OTHER CELEBRITY DO INSTEAD!

On the Sixth Sense / Last Airbender Director’s career:

DRUNK HULK JUST FIGURE OUT TWIST! M NIGHT SHYMALAN CAREER WAS DEAD WHOLE TIME!

On Kristen Stewart’s acting—appropriately, I read this after watching Adventureland:

DRUNK HULK LIKE KRISTEN STEWART! SHE METHOD ACTOR! SHE NO EVER BREAK CHARACTER! SHE ACT MISERABLE ALL TIME! THAT COMMITMENT!

On the economy:

TEEN EXPERIENCE WORST SUMMER JOB MARKET IN 41 YEAR! OH NO! NOW WHO WILL TREAT DRUNK HULK CONDESCENDING AT THE STARBUCK

On this year’s summer movies:

SUMMER MOVIE SEASON AWFUL! DRUNK HULK MOVIE SUMMER USUAL FEEL LIKE VAN HALEN! AND THIS YEAR SAMMY HAGAR TOOK OVER!

A cool idea for an amusement part for adults—which also reveals the fact that Drunk Hulk is literate:

HARRY POTTER PARK AT UNIVERSAL SUCCESS! DRUNK HULK HOPE THEY DO HENRY MILLER TROPIC OF CANCER PARK NEXT!

Looking back at Drunk Hulk’s younger days:

DRUNK HULK PRETEND BE BACK IN COLLEGE! FIRST LISTEN TO BEST OF BOB MARLEY! DRINK LOT! AND THEN BE LESBIAN FOR SIX MONTH!

NEW APPLE PRODUCT! A-TEAM! KARATE KID IN CINEMA! ALL DRUNK HULK NEED IS WHAM AND WHERE BEEF! AND IT 1984 ALL OVER AGAIN!

If I were Marvel, I’d hire this guy to write a Drunk Hulk TV show.  Hey, it worked for Shit My Dad Says.  Nuff Said!

Link:  Drunk Hulk Interview on Cover Stories.

Update: Comment from my old MT blog...

1 Comments

By Christian A. Dumais on July 19, 2010 12:21 AM

I appreciate being compared to Stephen Wright. That's certainly high praise. I'm glad you enjoy Drunk Hulk. I always appreciate it when people take the time to write about the big guy.

Great site, by the way!

Marvel Funnies for April Fools Day: Forbush-Man, Nick Fury, Thor vs Silver Surfer

Here are few pieces to drive you Marvelously Crazy this fine April Fools Day…

This cover to Crazy #1 (1972) by Marie Severin features Forbush-Man summing up the spirit of the early 1970s anti-war protests:  Support peace, you super-baddies, or we’ll clobber ya! 

Forbush-Man: a character I thought would have taken off more!  He looks to be making a comeback in next week’s parody special (of Captain America), Who Won’t Wear the Shield? 

What happens when Nick Fury goes scuba diving on vacation?  As Bruce Timm sees it, he just can’t stop taking all of his gear along with him, much to Val’s chagrin.  Perhaps Hydra was about to strike?  It’s a fine homage to Steranko’s covers and penchant for pockets and gear.

It really cracks me up that Fury is smoking a cigar inside that helmet!

Bruce Timm again, drawing the scene that John Buscema forgot in Silver Surfer #3.  Silly, but as a kid, I did always wonder why the Surfer never rammed anyone in the gut.

Last and certainly least, a terribly Inhuman pun.  Nuff Said!

Spider-Man and Superman Date Supergirl and Spider-Woman, By Fred Hembeck

Ever wonder what would happen if there was a Marvel-DC crossover event that was more on the romantic side?  Fred Hembeck did, back in 1981 for this cover to The Comic Reader 188.

I think it's very funny--especially with Hembeck's design which makes the couples mirror images of each other.  You have to wonder what other Marvel-DC swaps would work.  A Hawkeye/Black Canary and Green Arrow/Mockingbird pairing might be interesting.

Check out Hembeck's website for more lovable cartoons.  Nuff Said!

John Byrne Power Man and Iron Fist in the style of Mad Magazine's Don Martin

Here's a big laugh courtesy of John Byrne, from The Comic Reader 143, circa 1977.  It was around this period when Iron Fist was set to become Luke Cage's best buddy--and share the masthead when Power Man was re-titled Power Man and Iron Fist with issue #50.  Claremont and Byrne were the creators behind this odd couple pairing.

The signature reads: John Byrne, from an idea by Roger Stern, with apologies to Don Martin.  Don Martin was one of the premiere artists from Mad Magazine, who drew funny characters with elongated features.  Why not take a visit to the Don Martin Shrine today?  Nuff Said!

Ghost Rider in a Marvel Swimsuit

Ghost Rider in a Marvel Swimsuit?  It really happened, true believer!

The 1993 Marvel Swimsuit issue had this groovy centerfold featuring the Spirit of Vengeance on a beach.  Naked, which means burning on the beach.  Imagine your surprise if you got to this point in the magazine, expect to see something like a sexy Adam Hughes She-Hulk?  Nuff said.

Would you like to buy some Hulk Insurance?

In California, we have earthquake insurance.  In Hawaii and Florida, residents can buy hurricane insurance.  What type of protection does a homeowner really need in the Marvel Universe? 

Hulk insurance!

Great faux insurance ad, drawn by Dale Keown during his merged Hulk period, from the 1992 Marvel Swimsuit special.  The Hulk from this period of time was always one of my favorite versions of the character, and only Keown could draw that wicked look on his face.  Nuff said.

Marvel Ads: Beast's Shampoo, Wolverine's Speed Stick

The best thing from the Marvel Swimsuit issues were the faux advertisements.  Take these two, from Marvel Swimsuit 1991:



The Beast, drawn by George Perez, selling Ultra-X shampoo!  Seeing this reminds me that I prefer the Beast in his blue and furry form.  After reading Dark Avengers #7, do you think it’s possible Marvel will revert him back?

If you’ve ever given a dog a bath, you’ll know how much hair comes out—it can clog your drain if you do it in the bathroom.  The amount of hair the Beast would shed…OMG.  Probably there would be hair all over his bedroom and lab as well.



Wolverine, drawn by Mike Zeck, selling Macho speed stick deodorant!  Notice that it’s misspelled “deoderant”.  Never thought about superhero sweat until reading this ad.  The Marvel Universe must be a very stinky place indeed.  Nuff said.

Marvel Funnies: Spidey Introduces the Punisher to the Electric Company

If you grew up in the 1970s, you probably watched The Electric Company on PBS.  It was an educational show for the kids who got past Sesame Street.  Spider-Man appeared on the program, along with Morgan Freeman, who played Easy Reader.  As part of the deal with PBS, Marvel published Spidey Super Stories from 1974 to 1982.  The stories in this comic were aimed at much younger kids than Marvel’s usual audience. 

It was a gateway drug for Marvel!

The merry pranksters Roger Stern and John Byrne cooked up this faux Spidey Super Stories cover where Spider-Man says to the audience:  “Hey Kids!  Meet My Pal—The Punisher!”  As he blasts the guts out of a goon, the captions reads:  Bloody Death Scream the Guns of the Punisher!  Easy Reader says, Ouch!  Nuff said.

Marvel Funnies: Iron Sis and Shang-She

What if all the major Marvel Kung-Fu heroes were women?  That’s what John Byrne asked in this early 1975 gag from FOOM #9.

Shang-Chi would have been called Shang-She, Iron Fist morphed into Iron Fist, and even Fu Manchu trans-gendered into Su Manchu.

Perhaps these characters exist on the same Earth as Marvel’s Femizons along with Thundra.  Nuff said.

Marvel Funnies: Jarvis does the laundry in Avengers Mansion

What’s it like for Jarvis, butler to the Avengers, on a quiet day that is bereft of attacks by Skrulls and Masters of Evil?  The cover to Foom #6 in summer 1974 allowed us a peak into the life of the greatest butler in the Marvel Universe.

For Jarvis, it’s a day happily spent in the laundry room, polishing Captain America’s boots, washing costumes, and ironing the Vision’s cape.  The Avengers have left little notes on the cork-board. 

“My good man, there is entirely too much starch in my cape.”  The Mighty Thor

“Send autographed picture of me to Senator Buckley.”  Captain America.

“HELP!”  Your President.  Nixon.  I started to doubt the Captain America Secret Empire story after seeing this.

No idea who drew this cover.  Marie Severin or Paty?  Nuff said.

Marvel Funnies: 1970s Marvel Bullpen as the X-Men

Here’s another gem from Foom #10 (1975) by Paty Cockrum.  The 1970s Marvel Bullpen as the original X-Men!

Len Wein is the Beast.  Marv Wolfman is Iceman.  Duffy Vohland as Angel?  Paty as Marvel Girl.  And Stan the Man in Professor Xavier’s chair.  Nuff said.

Marvel Funnies: Storm critiques Ms. Marvel's costume, courtesy of John Byrne

Dave Cockrum was a master of costume design and among his many creations were the outfits for Storm and Ms. Marvel.  John Byrne, after he took over the X-Men, made this observation...

From the booklet for the 1978 Comic Art Convention.  Nuff said.

Marvel Funnies: Marie Severin Roasts Wein, Cockrum, Claremont Over New X-Men

I found this while researching the launch of the new X-Men in 1975.  Foom #10 had a special X-Men issue, and Marie Severin drew this great cartoon:

Severin drew Len Wein, Chris Claremont, and Dave Cockrum getting roasted alive by Marvel's fans--for replacing the classic X-Men team in Giant-Size X-Men #1.  They were indeed apprehensive about kicking out Angel, Marvel Girl, and Iceman!  No one could foresee the tremendous success that would befall upon the new and improved X-Men.  Nuff said.

Marvel Comics Kung Fu is sometimes just...Crazy!

In the early 70s, Marvel's goal was clearly to compete with all other graphic-related magazines.  They were taking on Warren with the monster mags (Dracula Lives, Vampire Tales, Monsters Unleashed, etc).  Marvel also went after Mad and Cracked with the humor magazine CRAZY in 1973.  Edited by Marv Wolfman, issue #7 (1974(1974) featured this cover taking on David Carradine's Kung Fu character:

ABC's Kung Fu TV series featured David Carradine as Kwai Chang Caine, a half Chinese, half American dude who wandered the Old West in search of his long lost brother.  In each episode, Caine would encounter any number of racist cowboys who wanted to skin him alive.  Luckily, he was trained by Shaolin monks to be an expert in Kung Fu!  The show was a huge hit on TV when it premiered in 1972.  My schoolmates raved about each episode the next day.

The show was so big, Marvel did two parodies of it!  Crazy #7 was the second one, with art by Marie Severin.  The first was the lead story in Crazy #1 (1973) with nice art by Mike Ploog.  The opening scene makes a great joke dead on target--Kung Fu always recycled some Western movie plot cliché that Caine would get involved in during the episode.  Widow having her cattle rustled?  Caine would fight the rustlers and save the cattle.

The success of the Kung Fu TV show definitely prodded Marvel into the genre and gave us Shang-Chi, Iron Fist, Deadly Hands of Kung Fu, and the White Tiger.  It also had an impact on Quentin Tarentino, who gave Samuel Jackson that famous line at the end of Pulp Fiction:  "You know, walk the earth, meet people...get into adventures. Like Caine from Kung Fu."  Nuff said.

Hulk Takes A Hostess Fruit Pie Break

How do you survive the onslaught of both the Abomination and the man-eating Wendigo?  Only with the help of a Hostess Fruit Pie!

Yes, Hulk feel much better, now Hulk can smash!

I’d like to see Hostess Fruit Pie ads return in Marvel Comics, perhaps with a David Finch drawn Spider-Woman enjoying a yummy Cherry Fruit Pie.  Nuff said.